Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Creepy Crawly Sound Effects, Volume 1

swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-Your--swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish

swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-nylon-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish

swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-pants-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish

swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish--drive-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish

swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish- us frickin’ crazy, so stop it!!! -swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish
swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish-swish.

Yes, you got them at a two-for-one sale at Modell’s, along with a pair of equally objectionable, ghetto fabulous day-glo polyester basketball shorts. But do you have to wear those long nylon pants in every cold-weather race? Every time you take a step, that swishing noise emanating from your nether regions is so loud it can be heard in outer space. You’ve got headphones on, also? That figures. We’d like to drown the noise out, too.

And how do you like trapping all that sweat inside, next to your tightie whities? No, don’t answer that. But y'know, you really can get a cheap pair of long running pants made from some polartec/polyester moisture-wicking material. Really. They’re not always that expensive, and they’ll keep you warmer than those two tubes of Hefty Bag material rubbing against each other. Making lots and lots and lots of noise.

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